Boy, did Tron: Legacy suck. It was this year’s equivalent of Avatar, being that the only positive thing I can say about it is it was kind of cool to look at. But if you’re hoping for relatable characters, interesting dialogue, or anything resembling a story, you’ll have to look elsewhere.
Garrett Hedlund stars as Garrett Hedlund, son of that guy from the equally boring original film, Tron. Hedlund doesn’t do a lot of acting, per se, but he does spend a lot of time looking at the camera going “Aren’t I cute? Yes, yes I am.” Jeff Bridges appears to have fun reprising his character, but having fun and being interesting onscreen are two very different things. Olivia Wilde is fun to look at, so that falls under my one positive thing. Oh, the movie also features a baffling cameo by the great Cillian Murphy for all of about 30 seconds in the beginning, before he disappears for the remainder of the film. I guess this is to hint at a possible sequel, but all it really does is make me wish I were watching a movie with more Cillian Murphy and less boring Windows screensaver action.
The script manages to squeeze in every clichéd, overused, action movie line known to man, including, but not limited to: “This isn’t happening!”, “This can’t be good”, and the classic “Now THAT is a big door.”
It’s tough to complain about “plot holes” in a movie like this, because theoretically the movie would have to have a plot in the first place in order to contain holes, but I’ll still mention some of my favorite moments. At one point in the film, Jeff Bridges is seen reprogramming an evil guard, and then bonking him on the head to turn the guard into his own personal servant. This seems like it’d be a handy trick to teach his son who’s been running around fighting these guards for days. Another interesting note is the fact that despite the portal planting Hedlund in the middle of the virtual city, Hedlund must travel hundreds of miles outside the city to exit said portal. And of course, the realization that at the end (SPOILER) Jeff Bridges is God and can knock over badguys with a seismic foot stomp. Magic might have been useful earlier in the movie. But what do I know.